Welcome to “Coaching Corner,” a new resource for perioperative leaders brought to you by OR Manager and Phyllis Quinlan, PhD, RN, NPD-BC—an acclaimed nurse entrepreneur, executive coach, and expert in leadership development and caregiver resilience. This dedicated space features weekly professional coaching and wellness insights from Dr Quinlan, tailored specifically for OR leaders and frontline caregivers navigating today’s complex healthcare environment.
Drawing from over 30 years of experience spanning trauma nursing, legal consulting, and system-wide coaching, Dr Quinlan delivers practical strategies to support personal growth, emotional resilience, and sustainable leadership in the OR and beyond. Bookmark this page and check back each week for a new tip, reflection, or action step—from boosting emotional intelligence to navigating career transitions—all crafted to help you rediscover joy and fulfillment in your professional life.
Dr Quinlan will also offer live professional coaching sessions during the upcoming OR Manager Conference, October 28 to 30 in Anaheim, California, providing attendees with a chance to engage directly with her evidence-based, mission-centered approach. Whether you are facing burnout, exploring new leadership roles, or seeking to realign your work with your deeper purpose, her insights are designed to empower your journey.
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Coaching Wisdom #17 (week of 8/25): Don’t Take the Bait
When you call someone out for trying to gaslight you—when they attempt to twist reality to make you feel crazy and question your own perceptions—they will often turn the tables. Accusations will fly. They will try to provoke you into defending yourself, pulling you into an emotional tug-of-war.
Don’t bite that worm. Gaslighting thrives on confusion and self-doubt. The moment you respond emotionally or defensively, the manipulator gains ground. Instead, stay grounded. Look them in the eye and calmly say, “That’s what I heard you say.” Nothing more. You don’t owe a justification for your truth.
Remain steady, even as they become loud or agitated. Their behavior will reveal more about their intentions than your words ever could. Let their actions speak for themselves while you stand in clarity, calm and confident. That’s your power.
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Coaching Wisdom #16 (week of 8/18): Let Your Documentation Speak for You
The number one way to lower your risk of being involved in a negligence claim is to document thoroughly, and to do it using the nursing process. Start by ensuring all licensed provider orders are noted and followed. If anything is unclear, ask questions. Then document your complete patient assessment regularly—at least as often as ordered. Use that assessment to guide the plan of care, and make sure you’re executing that plan thoughtfully and thoroughly.
But don’t stop there. Escalate concerns when your patient isn’t responding as expected. Reevaluate in a timely manner. Make sure your flow sheets are accurate and up to date. Most importantly, let your documentation reflect more than task completion. Let it show your clinical judgment, your understanding of the patient’s condition, and your advocacy on their behalf. When your charting tells the full story, it protects both your patient and your practice.
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Coaching Wisdom #15 (week of 8/11): Take Back Your Peace of Mind
How does worry serve you? It doesn’t. Worry is a thief. It robs you of your confidence, rational thinking, and vital energy. Most of all, it steals your joy and peace of mind. And the irony? Worry gives nothing back in return. No solutions, no clarity—just mental clutter and emotional fatigue.
When you find yourself spiraling and dwelling on something you can’t control, pause. Take one deliberate, deep breath and let it out slowly. Then get up. Move your body, even just a little. Shift your focus to something within your control, no matter how small. Regaining perspective often starts with the simplest actions.
You have the power to stop that thief in its tracks. Choose presence over worry. Choose action over rumination. The peace you’re seeking is always within reach once you stop giving it away.
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Coaching Wisdom #14 (week of 8/04): Make Work Relationships Count
Here’s an important reminder: Your career can depend on the quality of your work relationships and will be shaped as much by those relationships as by your skills. Each workday is a new opportunity to build, strengthen, or repair the relationships that influence your effectiveness, fulfillment, and future advancement.
At the end of each shift, start a new practice of asking yourself how you built a relationship that day:
- Did I strengthen an existing relationship?
- Did I initiate a new one?
- Did I take steps to mend a strained one?
If the answer isn’t “yes” to at least one of the above, your workday is incomplete. Relationship-building is essential to success. Let this daily reflection guide you toward stronger teams and a more satisfying professional life.
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Coaching Wisdom #13 (week of 7/28): Develop the Habit of Reading for Growth
Leadership is more than a title—it’s a mindset that must be continuously nurtured. Leaders are lifelong learners and should always be curious about the experience of others. One of the simplest and most impactful habits you can build as a current or aspiring leader is to read regularly. Commit to three work-related books a year. That’s it.
Not only will that deepen your understanding of best practices and spark innovative ideas, but it also demonstrates to others—including potential employers—that you’re committed to growth. Many interviewers are now asking candidates, “What are you reading?” Be ready to answer with enthusiasm and insight.
Need help fitting reading into your schedule? Audiobooks can be a game-changer. Use time in the car, on the treadmill, or while waiting at the airport to turn idle moments into learning opportunities.
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Coaching Wisdom #12 (week of 7/21): Navigate Vampires in the Workplace
Beware! Vampires are real. I’m referring to “Energy Vampires.” You know the feeling—you finish a conversation and suddenly feel like your emotional battery is at zero. You’ve likely just encountered an energy vampire. These individuals thrive on drama, complaint, and conflict. They have a problem for every solution and will draw others into their negativity.
In a busy clinical environment, it’s critical to conserve your emotional resources. If you must engage with these individuals, keep the interaction strictly professional. Stick to work-related tasks and avoid socializing during breaks or meals. While it may seem unkind, protecting your own well-being sometimes means setting boundaries.
Remember: their negativity is not your responsibility. Your empathy is valuable, so don’t let it be exploited.
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Coaching Wisdom #11 (week of 7/14): Find Mindfulness in Daily Routines
Feeling overwhelmed by the nonstop demands of the day? Like you need to be fully present but are instead caught up in worrisome thoughts? Look for ways to weave some mindful moments into your day. Mindfulness doesn’t require a retreat or an hour of meditation. It can start with something as simple as using hand sanitizer.
Try this. The next time you reach for that dispenser, use those 20–30 seconds as an opportunity to reconnect with the present. As you rub the liquid over your hands, take two or three deliberate, deep breaths. Exhale slowly. That breathing will activate the relaxation centers in your brain and begin to neutralize the excess epinephrine circulating in your system. You’ll start to feel calmer, more grounded, and more comfortable in your skin.
It’s a small action, but it can shift your entire day. Just breathe.
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Coaching Wisdom #10 (week of 7/7): Validate Before You Trust AI Hallucinations
Artificial Intelligence (AI) is transforming the way we access and generate information—but with great power comes great responsibility. The “AI hallucination” phenomenon is real. AI hallucinations occur when an AI platform produces content or references that sound convincing but are, in fact, completely fictious. Imagine confidently submitting a report or presentation, only to learn later that your citations are false or the “facts” you quoted don’t exist. It’s not just embarrassing—it can damage your credibility.
The takeaway? Don’t assume everything generated by AI is accurate. Fact-check everything. Cross-reference with trusted sources. Before you share, present, or publish, review AI-generated content as critically as you would a human draft. Your reputation—and peace of mind—depend on it.
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Coaching Wisdom #9 (week of 6/30): Shift from Helping to Healing
As nurses and professional caregivers, we often blur the lines between helping and caring. It’s natural to want to ease the burden of those in pain. Many of us were drawn to nursing out of a deep desire to help. But there’s a crucial shift we must make to preserve both our integrity and our well-being: We were never meant to be helpful. We are meant to be therapeutic.
Helping, when it becomes habitual or unchecked, often means stepping in to solve someone else’s problem—absorbing their discomfort, managing their emotional load, or rushing to fix what feels broken. While well-intentioned, this can short-circuit another person’s growth. When we do the work for others, we rob them of the opportunity to build coping skills and resilience. Being therapeutic is different. It’s rooted in presence, not fixing. It means holding space—steady, compassionate, and nonjudgmental—while others do the difficult work of healing or adapting to change. It means trusting in their strength while offering steady support. It’s empowerment, not enabling.
This distinction is vital. Constantly operating in ‘helper mode’ leads to overextension and, eventually, self-sacrifice. Self-sacrifice, while romanticized in healthcare, often has a steep cost: resentment. Resentment distances us from our purpose. It numbs our empathy and isolates us. Over time, we close down our hearts and retreat into our heads for protection. This is what true burnout looks like—not just exhaustion, but disconnection from what once gave us meaning.
Preserve your heart. Maintain your boundaries. Lead from a place that uplifts both you and those under your care. Assume your mission of being therapeutic.
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Coaching Wisdom #8 (week of 6/23): Find the Courage to Let Go
Emotional intelligence isn’t just about managing emotions; it’s about evolving how you lead, think, and live. One of the most powerful (and challenging) aspects of developing emotional intelligence is finding the courage to let go of patterns that no longer serve you. These might be habitual ways of thinking, reacting, or leading that once felt protective or efficient, but now undermine your growth. In fact, they may be causing you to unintentionally sabotage yourself.
Letting go isn’t a single decision. It’s a process that happens in stages:
- Receive feedback. Whether it’s a moment of frustration, a trusted colleague’s comment, or an internal feeling, something tells you: ‘This isn’t working anymore.’
- Reflect. Through honest introspection—maybe in the quiet moments after a long shift—you realize: ‘Yes, it’s time for change.’
- Monitor and course-correct. Begin the daily work of catching yourself mid-thought or mid-action. Shift your language, tone, and assumptions.
- Release. Over time, the old ways loosen their grip. In their place, space opens up for fresh thinking, better strategies, and healthier relationships with yourself and others.
Letting go isn’t easy, but growth rarely happens in comfort zones. As a perioperative leader, your willingness to evolve not only supports your well-being, it strengthens your leadership from the inside out. What are you ready to let go of today?
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Coaching Wisdom #7 (week of 6/16): Notice the Miracles
Renowned nurse theorist Dr Jean Watson and her Theory of Human Caring offers timeless wisdom. Among her ten Caritas Processes, Caritas #10 reminds us to stay open to the “spiritual, mystery, and unknowns—allowing for miracles.” This isn’t just poetic language. It’s a call to embrace the fullness of the human experience, in ourselves and in those for whom we care.
Dr Watson challenges us to widen our lens and see beyond modern medicine and nursing. Be open to seeing the art of healing and the moments where connection, presence, and compassion create their own kind of miracles. This Caritas invites you to look beyond the monitors and charts. See the whole person on the table—their fears, hopes, and the loved ones they carry with them. Notice how your presence, your touch, and your leadership impact not just a physical outcome but also the emotional and spiritual journey of those in your care.
And just as importantly, be open to what your patients and their families give you in return: resilience, gratitude, vulnerability. These too are miracles; allow yourself to experience them. Stay present. That’s how we keep our hearts full, even in the most technical of environments.
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Coaching Wisdom #6 (week of 6/9): Practice Self-Compassion
When mistakes happen or outcomes fall short, it’s easy to turn inward with harsh self-judgment. But here’s the thing: Being compassionate toward yourself doesn’t mean letting yourself off the hook. It means responding to your own setbacks with the same empathy and support you would offer a colleague who is struggling.
Self-compassion allows you to acknowledge mistakes, reflect, and grow without the weight of shame or criticism. It’s rooted in recognizing your shared humanity—that all of us are imperfect, learning, and evolving. In fact, research shows that self-compassion leads to greater personal accountability, not less, because it creates a safe inner space to confront and learn from challenges honestly.
Ask yourself: ‘Would I speak to a team member the way I speak to myself?’ Take a moment to explore your own self-compassion with the free Self-Compassion Inventory at www.selfcompassion.org. You might be surprised by what you learn—and what it opens up for you as a leader and caregiver.
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Coaching Wisdom #5 (week of 6/2): Make the First Impression Count
Many people hold back from reaching out or networking on LinkedIn, and not just because they lack confidence or experience. Your profile picture—or lack of one—may be hindering you more than you realize. Your photo speaks before your words do. It sets the tone for how others perceive you in a professional space.
Here’s the good news: your photo doesn’t need to be professionally taken. It just needs to be well-lit and reflect a work-ready version of you. Aim for a forward-facing shot where your face is easy to see; a smile is always a plus. If you wear glasses, keep them on. As long as your eyes are visible, it’s absolutely fine. Think approachable and authentic, not perfect.
Small details can have a big impact. A clear, friendly photo invites connection and builds trust. So take a few minutes to upload a picture of yourself that says, ‘I’m here, I’m ready, and I’d love to connect.’
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Coaching Wisdom #4 (week of 5/26): Reflect on your Self-Talk
We all have moments when our inner voice turns critical—when our self-talk becomes harsh and unkind. But if that voice is a constant presence, it quietly chips away at our confidence, self-worth, and peace of mind. The way we talk to ourselves can make all the difference. If judgmental self-talk has turned into a habit, please resolve to break it.
There are enough people ready to question your worth and undermine your confidence. Don’t be one of them. Instead, speak to yourself the way you would to someone you love. You’re doing the best you can, and that deserves recognition. Be generous with self-compassion. Cheer yourself on. Show up for yourself—not just when you succeed, but especially when you struggle.
The relationship you have with yourself sets the tone for everything else in your life. Let it be one of kindness.
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Coaching Wisdom #3 (week of 5/19): Utilize the Power of Regret
Author Dan Pink once observed that, over time, people tend to regret what they didn’t do far more than what they did do. It’s striking how missed opportunities can linger in our memories longer than our mistakes.
Regret, when viewed through a compassionate lens, isn’t something to fear or avoid. It can be a powerful force for reflection and transformation. It reminds us of our untapped potential—of the paths we didn’t take, the chances we passed on, the words we left unspoken. Rather than allowing those feelings to weigh us down, we can let them fuel us.
Let regret become a guide, not a burden. Use it to summon courage, challenge comfort zones, and say ‘yes’ to growth. Each risk we take, whether it leads to success or a lesson, helps shape a life that feels lived and fully experienced.
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Coaching Wisdom #2 (week of 5/12): Commit to Sleeping Better
Sleep isn’t just rest—it’s the foundation of physical and mental health. When we allow ourselves the gift of 7 to 8 uninterrupted hours each night, we invite healing, renewal, and balance into our lives. Let’s turn nighttime into a sacred ritual and commit to sleeping better. Here’s a start:
- Refresh your sleep space. If your mattress is over 10 years old, it’s time to upgrade. A supportive, comfortable bed makes a world of difference.
- Invest in comfort. Choose soft, breathable bedding and sleepwear that helps your body relax. You deserve to feel wrapped in ease.
- Create an ‘End-of-Day’ ritual. Pick a time each evening to power down your devices and ease into stillness. This routine signals to your brain that the day is done, and it’s time to wind down.
- Embrace calming affirmations. As you settle into bed, repeat these three affirmations to quiet your mind and welcome rest:
- I am grateful for all the blessings in my life, big and small.
- I release all negativity from today and welcome calm into my being.
- I am ready to wake up as a magnet for abundance, peace, and clarity.
Let sleep be more than a habit—let it be a healing ritual. Are you ready to reclaim your nights?
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Coaching Wisdom #1 (week of 5/5): Reconnect Mission and Purpose
Before the week runs away with charts, meetings, and call-bells, give yourself a ‘Mission–Purpose‘ check-in. Take 5 undisturbed minutes and ask:
- Mission: Why did I choose to care for others in the first place?
- Purpose: How did I live that ‘why’ in the last 24 hours?
If your answers align, breathe in the validation and keep that flame stoked. If they clash—or if the answers feel foggy—notice, don’t judge. Instead, pick one small action that reconnects the two: delegate a non-nursing task, request a huddle to voice a concern, or block time for a skill you’ve wanted to grow. Small, deliberate pivots can safeguard you from prolonged burnout and move you toward the stronger, wiser version of yourself.
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